There is a metaphor about a boiling pot of crabs. Some of the crabs will try to escape the boiling pot but others will pull them back into the pot. This is how dysfunctional systems and families work. Many time there will be one or two family members trying to escape the system but the other members of the system continue to pull them back into the system and its rules.
This can be seen when there is a family reunion or get together and a person has been away from the family for awhile. When the person is away that person may be successful and confident, but when that person returns to the family system he/she loses all confidence and returns to how he/she was while living with the family. This happens to all of us on a lesser degree or maybe greater in some cases.
Characters will also belong to different systems that expect them to behave in a certain way. When they are around their friends they will act one way that may be different than when they are around their families and even in a different manner when around associates.
We are all pulled into our systems just like the crabs and ironically when we fight against that system we may be in actuality supporting the homeostasis of that system :)
You know what this reminds me of? A quote I heard, "Every family is a dictatorship ruled by its sickest member." I think characters are the same way - they are a family and like you said can be ruled by a central force.
ReplyDeleteOh this post is so disturbing though because in reality it's so tough to fight against a system in general and once you do its a force all by itself to try and drag you back in or punish you for fighting against it.
most def...you can see this come into play when people go home...this came up too when i went on a relief trip to KY...a real impoverished area...and the question was asked why they dont just leave...but it is all they ever knew...and where family was...
ReplyDeleteThis a great point and reminds me of a conversation I had with a coworker. She brought up the example of Neo and the matrix in that he was created to fight the system in order to fight the system in order to keep things running how the system wanted it to run.
ReplyDeleteIt kind of works the other way as well. You have a family that is successful and one person is not. Whenever they are around the rest of the family tried to pull them back. We normally see this as rich superiority. The problem comes when the outlier doesn't have any choice. That's my opinion anyway.
ReplyDeleteThis is a great post. I'm definitely different with my family than I am away from them.
ReplyDeleteHi, Josh. Thanks for stopping by my blog and following. I love the concept of your blog. I'm a new follower and look forward to stopping back.
ReplyDeleteYes. And this is what makes characters 3 dimensional. Tanks for linking up with our weds hop.
ReplyDeletevery interesting to think about...and you may be right...I know a man who made it big in the big city...but when he comes back home, he is still the same kid i went to high school with....
ReplyDeletei am your newest follows..pls follow back if you can.
I agree...too often we are "expected" to act or be a certain way. Those "crabs" just don't want to see others succeed. I have also had first hand experience with this.
ReplyDeleteOh wow I can so identify with this. It's exactly what I need to convey in my own WIP.
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