Summing Up Saturday Part 4

Welcome to all my new followers hope you find this blog informative and helpful in your quest to make the perfect character and to better understand your self. Don’t forget to sign up for the 100 Followers Celebration. Remember you must let me know you want to participate on the 100 Followers Celebration page.

Monkey Man said...

The more blogs you visit and comment on the more returns you get. Setting your sights high is a good thing Go for it and good luck with finals.

My Thoughts-This is an excellent point. I have found the more I do to support others the natural consequence is to get support back.

Lisa Ricard Claro said...

Josh - I'm fascinated by the profiles you offer and can definitely see how understanding each one would make for deeper, better character portrayals. I do believe an MC could be a narcissist as long as he/she possesses other stellar characteristics. It would be a balancing act, but would definitely make for a colorful protagonist.

 My Thoughts- The balancing act is so important when creating our characters. We need them to be authentic in the world we create.

Brian Miller said...

ok def nightmares on the snails...lol...both of these books sound intriguing...for me the janitor one most def...janitors were always kinda mysterious...and the peppermint dust they used to clean the puke up...

My Thoughts- This one just made me laughJ

Emily said...

I think everyone we meet has a chance to inspire us, either through being such a good example of who we want to be when we "grow up" or as an example of what to avoid because we see the pain and misery in their lives. For me, my family is the largest group who have given me strength to overcome challenges. I've have been really lucky in that regard. There are also countless people who I have come in contact with either through the writing or religious communities that offer great support.

My Thoughts- I agree with this completely. We are influenced by everyone we come in contact with to some degree.  The opposite is also true we influence everyone we come in contact with to some degree, whether to become better people or worse.

Pam Torres said...

Whew! Do I feel psycho-analytical. I think it would be useful to have these schema descriptions on 3x5 cards and mix and match them when creating a character...mmm. Is it bad that I kept seeing my ex-husband in some of those...HeeHee...

My Thoughts- What a great tip on how to keep all the schemas organized and at our fingertips.

Lucy Adams said...

I know a woman who smiles no matter what she says. When she's being critical she smiles. When she's being complimentary, she smiles. When she talks about something that makes her angry or frustrates her, she smiles.

She's an incredibly difficult person to interact with, especially when her emotions are ambiguous. She makes it likely that the other person will always say the wrong thing.

Oh, did I mention she's easily insulted?

She would make a great character in a book.

Lucy

My Thoughts- Pearls would go to town on this person. This is a great example of a person using their body language to try and cover up their true emotions.

Remember go here to sign up for the contest.

What was your favorite post of the week? 

Gestalt Theory

Gestalt theory is a fascinating theory to me. It was developed by Fritz Pearls, a German born Psychiatrist. The whole point of the theory is to get people to become more aware of the here and now and to take responsibility. It has some really amazing points to it that I completely agree with. The delivery is not my style though because of how confrontational it is.

One of the things that Fritz does or a Gestaltian does is make the client aware of their physical movements and actions. They do this by pointing things out to them like: “What are you doing with your leg” or “I see your eyes are starting to tear up.” The psychologist is doing this throughout the session. It is interesting and if you want to watch Fritz doing it you can go here. Fritz also talks more about the theory in the beginning.

Okay what does this have to do with characterization? First of all, this blog, if you have noticed isn’t all about characterizationJ (but that’s besides the point) The point is that we/our characters say one thing but mean another. For example in the clip Gloria is smiling while she is talking about sad things. Fritz points this out to her. We all do this and Fritz would call us phonies. So, when we are creating our characters in our books remember that their actions, their body language do not always match what they are saying or feeling.

Body language doesn’t lie even when our words may beJ

What are your thoughts on this? Do you think we can lie with our body language? Can we ever truly mask our thoughts and feelings? Also, can another person really be good enough to interpret our body language accurately, like on the show Lie To ME?

There are only a few days left for me to reach my goal of 100 followers in a month. I am planning a celebration one week after I reach my hundredth follower. At this time I’ll be giving away a $15 Amazon gift certificate. Go here to get the rules.

Schema’s and Traits Part 9

I am getting my information from “Schema Therapy a Practitioners Guide” by Jeffrey E. Young, Janet S. Klosko, and Marjorie E. Weishaar. The next domain is Over vigilance and Inhibition. This is our last domain with four Schemas. I decided we might as well knock them all out today. So, here we go.

The first one is Negativity/Pessimism. A person with this schema displays a lifelong focus on the negative while minimizing the positives. This schema can be learned by the parent or it is because of hardships as a child. The latter is harder to overcome because the person has experienced the loss and hardship first hand t an early age. The goal is to help people look at the future more objectively.

Emotional Inhibition is the second schema in this domain. People with this schema are excessively inhibited to express their emotions. They are affectively flat, no emotion and self-controlled rather than spontaneous. They not only hold back their anger but also their warmth. These people often have the obsessive compulsive personality disorder as well. These people are rigid and inflexible. The goal is to help them become more emotionally expressive.

A person with the Unrelenting Standards/Hypercriticalness schema present as perfectionistic and driven. They feel they must reach unrealistic high standards all the time. These standards are internalized therefore they do not change these expectations based on others expectations. They do it because they “should” not because they want anything from it. They feel a lot of pressure to achieve. Failing means 95%. It is not only difficult to have unrelenting standards but it is also difficult to be around someone who has unrelenting standards. These people are workaholics. The goal is to help people accomplish less and to do it not as perfectly.

The final schema is Punitiveness. People with this schema believe that people, including themselves, should be punished harshly for their mistakes. They are moralistic and intolerant, and have a difficult time with forgiving others and themselves of their mistakes. People should not be forgiven but should be punished, no excuses permitted. The goal is to overcome this belief of punitiveness and be more forgiving.

Well there you have it all of the schemas you would ever want to know about. Thanks for staying tuned in and for your wonderful comments throughout.  Which is your favorite schema? What have you learned about yourself, others and most importantly of course your characters? What schema have you incorporated into your stories? And how many of you were saying each day, “That’s me?” (BTW that is a natural phenomenon while going through a diagnostic course  to feel like you fit all of the diagnosisJ

Schema’s and Traits Part 8

I am getting my information from “Schema Therapy a Practitioners Guide” by Jeffrey E. Young, Janet S. Klosko, and Marjorie E. Weishaar. Today we will be looking at a new domain called The Domain of Other-Directedness. There are three schemas in this domain: Subjugation, Self-Sacrifice, and Approval-Seeking/Recognition-Seeking.

Subjugation is where a person allows another person to dominate them. They surrender control because they fear either punishment or abandonment by the other person. There are two types, subjugation of emotions or subjugation of needs. In emotions they are suppressing their feelings such as anger. The person feels his own needs and feelings are not valid or important to other people. These people are excessively compliant and hypersensitive to feeling trapped. They feel bullied, harassed and powerless. There is a significant amount of fear with this schema. The goal is to help them see that they have rights to have their needs and feelings; they have the right to express them.

The Self-Sacrifice schema is similar to subjugation in the fact that a person is trying to meet the needs of others at the expense of their own needs. The difference is that this sacrifice is seen as voluntary.  They do it to prevent others from experiencing pain, to do what they feel is right, to avoid feelings of guilt or selfishness, or to maintain connection with others. They feel resentful often when they do not get something in return even though they don’t expect anything in return. Goal is to help them see that everyone has the right to get their needs met, including themselves.

The Approval-Seeking/Recognition-Seeking schema is when a person places an extreme emphasis on gaining approval or recognition. They are constantly focused on the reactions of others rather than their own reactions. Because of this they fail to develop a stable, inner-directed sense of self. There are two types: the one that wants everyone to like them and the second wants applause and admiration. The latter are frequently narcissistic. One person with this schema said I would rather look like I’m having a good life than actually having one. These people are people pleasers in order to get approval. They make us uncomfortable because they are so eager to please. The goal is to help them recognize the authentic self and that it is different than the false self.

I want to thank BlueStocking Mum for the Versatile Blogging award. It is such an honor to win this from someone who I think has such a wonderful blog. Thank you all for helping me through this exciting world of blogging it has been fun to get to know all of you and to learn and laugh with each one of you. Even though I may not comment on all of your blogs I do visit them each day to read your words of wisdom. They make me laugh and cry. They inspire me to be better to try harder. Thank you all for the changes you have made in my life.

Who has inspired you? Who has given you the strength to overcome your challenges?

Wow and look how close we are to reaching 100 followers!!!! 

Books and Snails

Today I have a couple of promises to keep.

First, it is an amazing book by Daniel Coleman that I had the privilege of critiquing and now is available at Amazon in ebook format. Here is the back cover blurb.

“One, two! One, two! and through and through the vorpal blade went snicker-snack!”  Blood pounded in Tjaden’s ears as he breathed in the acrid odor, and his sword didn’t falter.  Not after the convoluted road that had led him to set out alone to find and slay the manxome Jabberwocky.  But the secrets he’d learned about the Jabberwocky’s sorrowful past made it a sour victory.

 How different would the situation be if the girl he loved wasn’t at risk?  Why didn’t Captain Darieus tell him the dark secrets surrounding the Tumtum tree? 

 Jabberwocky, a short novel by Daniel Coleman, is the untold story behind Lewis Carroll’s beloved poem.  Meet the characters and creatures that inhabit the world long before Alice ever fell down the rabbit’s hole.

 While staying true to every detail of Lewis Carroll’s masterpiece, Jabberwocky provides twists that will keep you turning pages.  You might know how it ends, but you won’t believe how it happens.

You can pick it up at

Amazon

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B004UB7SR8. 

Smashwords -- for iPad, Nook, Kobo, etc.
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/50204

Second is another book that is soon to be released on August 3^rd by Ty Whiteside.

"Have you ever fallen asleep during math class? Do you get distracted easily while listening to your English teacher? Do you find yourself completely disinterested in geography? Well, it may not be your fault. The janitors at Welcher Elementary know a secret, and it's draining all the smarts out of the kids. Twelve-year-old Spencer Zumbro, with the help of Daisy "Gullible" Gates, must fight with and against a mysterious janitorial society with wizard-like powers. Who can be trusted - and how will Spencer and Daisy protect their school and possibly the world? Find out in JANITORS, the first book in a new children's fantasy series by debut novelist Tyler Whitesides. You'll never look at a mop the same way again. "

And finally “Rise of the Snails” a video that will give you nightmares (not really just trying to build tension) and keep you up all night (another tension builder). This is a video of my tank at feeding time. They may look slow but they will eat anything that hits the bottom of the tank.

Schema’s and Traits Part 7

I am getting my information from “Schema Therapy a Practitioners Guide” by Jeffrey E. Young, Janet S. Klosko, and Marjorie E. Weishaar. Today we will be looking at a new domain called the Impaired Limits. This domain includes the Entitlement/Grandiosity and Insufficient self-control/self discipline.

This is one that we have all recognized in a few people but maybe not to the extreme. In a nutshell these people feel special. They feel they are better than others, part of an elite and as such are entitled to special rights and privileges. They try to control others to meet their own needs, without empathy or concern for the others’ needs. They are excessively competitive, snobby, dominating of others, assert power in a harmful way, and force one’s point of view on others. There is a distinction between the narcissistic and the entitled. Narcissistic are trying to cover up an underlying feeling of defectiveness while entitled were spoiled as children and continue this behavior into adulthood. The goal is to help them understand the principle of reciprocity and accept it.

Insufficient Self-Control/Self-Discipline is characterized by people lacking two qualities: 1) self control –restraining one’s emotions and impulses and 2) self discipline – being able to tolerate boredom and frustration in order to accomplish a task or goal (like getting publishedJ They lack the ability to delay short term gratification to achieve long term goals. They do not learn sufficiently from experiences- from the negative consequences of their behaviors. In the milder forms they are people who avoid discomfort.  Typical behavior is: impulsivity, distractibility, disorganization, unwillingness to persist in boring tasks, intense expression of emotions, and habitual lateness or unreliability. The goal is to help people give up short term gratification for long term goals.

What kind of characters could we make up with these schemas? The narcissist seems easy for a villain. What about a narcissistic hero? Many of our politicians are narcissists, they almost have to be to overcome the constant battering and scrutiny of the public. What about insufficient self-control, how could a MC have this schema? What do you think?

Thanks again for all the support!! 

Summing Up Saturday Part 3

First off, Wow to all the wonderful comments and new followers. I appreciate your support and encouraging words. When I first started blogging again 3 weeks ago I set the goal to have 100 followers by the end of the month. Thanks to all of you this is a possibility. I do plan on having a 100 follower party, so the sooner we get the sooner we can party. Plus next week is the last week of the semester so we can party for two thingsJ.

Some amazing comments have been made this week here are a just a handful of them and what I liked about them.

Tracy said...

Fascinating Josh!
thanks for sharing so much information...when I write, I write from the heart and don't know the identity of what it is I am doing but you hit the nail on the head; thanks so much!

What a wonderful way to write from the heart. This I think is an important message, as writers we can learn all the techniques and tips and tools but unless we write from the heart it will be meaningless.

Roland D. Yeomans said...

Isn't the community of writers in our cyber-sphere kind and supportive?

The death of long-time pet changed me the most this week as I thought upon the life lessons her intelligence and taking with her in the future only the best of her nature. Have a great Sunday, Roland

It is a sad thing to hear of a loved one passing, but the message is still there of the importance of the time we have together and the lessons we learn from one another.

J.L. Campbell said...

Your post has me thinking that it's no wonder some of us end up in bad relationships. We go into them with our problems, seeking something the other person may either not be willing to give or on the other hand, may provide what we're looking for to excess.

This is a great insight into the problems we face in our relationships and the baggage that all of us carry around with us. To me this is the importance of not expecting ourselves to be perfect or others. It also is so important to have good coping skills and communication skills.

~Sia McKye~ said...

I do use my training as a counselor in building characters and having them act and react realistically. Some good points here, Josh. I linked the article to my facebook status.

It is always nice to get a mention J

Charmaine Clancy said...

Do you have to be careful about mentioning that you had a computer repair business? I reckon it'd be like telling people you're a doctor, they'd suddenly want free advice on their illnesses :)

So true, so true J but at the same time what an amazing experience it has been to learn more and even though I failed at making money from the business I was successful in being able to help others. I think about the advice we give to others and how it seems to always come back around and help us in the long run.

Meegan, the Evil Stepmother said...

Nicely done. It takes a lot of skill to concisely convey an idea without just out and saying it. Very nice.

I don’t know if it is skill or many many revisions (I still look at it and say wow I need to change that and that.) I think this is a good point that it takes a lot of practicing.

Hope everyone has a great weekend. Sorry for not getting around to as many blogs as usual but it is finals week.